Sloppy Lady

After spending way too much time prying myself out of yesterday's outfit - I played it safe today with some slightly loose cords and a billowy top. Not exactly fashion forward but nice and comfortable for a 15 hour workday.

Does Anyone Have a Crowbar?

Once again I followed the advice of Lucky Magazine and ended up someplace I shouldn't have gone to - pants without Lycra. According to Lucky, pants with Lycra tend to emphasize your bulges whereas slim cut pants without stretch are less likely to make you look like sausage in too tight casing.

What they failed to mention is once you get the pants on - you cannot get them off. So you may be seeing these pants all week unless I magically drop a few pounds or find a crowbar.

Pants: Gap 1969

Top: Boden

Sweater: Target

Boots: Timberland

Priorities

I literally have 15 minutes before all hell breaks lose at work today and I spent 5 of those minutes photographing my outfit and writing this post. Clearly priorities are not my strong suit.

Sweater: Madewell

Jeans: Old Navy

Boots: Uggs

Necklace: ? via Piperlime

New Stuff - Part One of .....

The next few weeks promise to be excruciatingly difficult at work which has triggered my "buy ALL THE THINGS" reflex.   This of course starts a vicious cycle of needing to return most of the things which adds extra errands to my already crazy day.  Today's keeper items are this silk blouse from the Madewell sale and this bracelet.  Although I love bracelets in concept, I rarely wear them because I don't like to have my wrists restrained (ever notice how my sleeves are rolled up in 75% of my outfits?).  However, I made an exception for this one because, OMG, cute! Right?

Waiter There Is a Fly In My Soup

I find it very hard to wear a black suit/white shirt without feeling like a waiter at TGIFridays.  To offset the stuffiness I threw on a belt, as many silver necklaces as I could find, and my beloved comfortable blue shoes.  What do you think, did I succeed or should I be offering you some fresh ground pepper with this post?

Suit: Banana Republic
Short: Bass
Belt: ? via Goodwill
Shoes: Jessica Simpson via TJ Maxx

Wrinkled Lady

In my mind this outfit is super sleek and ladylike.  Unfortunately, my iPhone could not take a picture of my vision and took a picture of this frumpy wrinkled outfit instead.  Also, is it just me or does it look like I have some strange growth on my left shin?  


Shirt: J. Crew via Goodwill
Sweater and cuff: J. Crew via recent sale
Skirt: United Colors of Benetton via eBay
Shoes: Max Studio via TJ Maxx

Happiness Is a Warm Pair of Pants

I got these pants at the super sale at J. Crew and I LOVE them.  Although plaid capris are not my usual "look" these are so awesome I made an exception and I'm glad I did.  


Pants: J. Crew
Sweater: Gap (men's)
Jacket: Old Navy
Shoes: Franco Sarto (ancient)

Baxter Needs Thumbs

This is probably my last attempt at using my tree as a background. I'm too lazy to figure out a better resting place for the camera and, as you can see, Baxter would rather just stare at me than act as my photographer (he claims it is lack of thumbs but I think he just doesn't want to support my bad habits).

Jeans: Levis

Shirt: Old Navy

Sweater: Ancient Banana Republic

Boots: HK Heidi Klum

The Lazy Bird Gets Dressed

This morning I had a productive spurt of energy in which I finally packed up some items I needed to return. As I was gathering things, I found a bag on the back of my door containing two shirts I planned to return to Target a few months ago. Since the return period has expired, I had no choice but to put one on and make the best of it.

I will not bore you with my struggles to get a decent photo this morning, but I did try. I failed but I really did try.

Shirt, Sweater, Shoes: Target

Cords: J. Crew via Goodwill

Hail Mary

It may not look like much, but considering that I almost had to stay home from work for lack of something to wear, this outfit is a win in my book. I started the day wanting to wear a new pair of pants, but I soon concluded that the pants were not flattering. I moved on to a shirt which was cute but would require me to sit up straight and not eat all day. Rinse, lather, repeat until I threw this on and decided it was acceptable.

Shirt: Akiko

Cardigan: J. Crew

Jeans: Levis

Boots: Gap

Belly: last night's apple tart and 5lbs of popcorn

Regrets

I knew within two minutes of putting on these shoes that I would regret choosing them. What I didn't know is that I'd regret the whole outfit once I got to work. Oh well dress and learn.

Dress: Boden

Jacket: Old Navy

Shoes: RJ Girl

Day of Rest

Although exercise remains an anathema to me, a few months ago I started learning how to run in an effort to have an activity that gets my brain off of work. One of the best things about running - the day of rest. Since I run on the weekends - Monday is my rest day. Today is extra restful because I do not have to be in court. Maybe I can take it one step further today and leave work before 7pm.

Shirt: J. Crew via Goodwill

Sweater: J. Crew Factory

Jeans: Old Navy

Belt: on my bed at home where it is being quite ineffectual at holding up my pants.

Gorgeous Gal

There are some inconveniences that stem from working across the street from a mental health treatment facility. At least once a week the police are called to handle some disturbance and it can get very noisy. On the other hand, many of the residents are quite sweet - including the gentleman this morning who called me a gorgeous gal.

Considering I was feeling anything but gorgeous at the time, it was a nice way to start the morning.

Dress/cardigan - Missoni for Target

Boots - DV for Target

Coat - ? from Bloomingdales a million years ago

These Are Not the Pants You Are Looking For

Well, they are not the pants I was looking for. I really wanted camel colored wool pants. These are more tan and not wool. I thought I could make them work but my attempts so far have failed - see today's outfit and Plaintiff's exhibit 1. And don't ask why I chose this scarf, because I don't know.

Pants and Sweater: Gap

Scarf: Jessica Simpson

Maybe I shouldn't have changed out of this morning's other outfit....

Documentary

I spent WAY too much brain space today debating whether or not to use a photo that shows me wearing the jacket that goes with this suit or not*. The photo without the jacket, shows the very cute blouse and is, therefore, 100% more interesting. The photo with the jacket is less interesting but is actually what I am wearing. Which lead me to wonder whether my compulsion to treat this blog as a documentary of my wardrobe, is interfering with my creative expression (and making a boring blog even more boring). So I decided to throw caution to the wind and use the photo without the jacket. But, don't worry, I will still use this space to document the mundane, and often ugly, aspects of my life - such as the fact that I know all the lyrics to "Lost in Love" by Air Supply and played the song very loudly in my car this morning.

The truth can be ugly folks.

I wonder if Michael Moore has these problems.

* I know I could have posted both, but then I wouldn't have had anything to write about.

Why I Could Never Live in Seattle

One word: Rain. I know rain is necessary to make the plants grow and what not, but it is so frigging inconvenient. It kept me from being able to go running this morning (I know it is possible to run in the rain but my motivation is not that strong), it made the house dark resulting in this crappy photo, and it killed my dog. Okay, I don't have a dog but I still don't like rain.

Skirt, Sweater, and Necklace: J. Crew

Shoes: Biviel

Sweatsuit

I have been quite remiss in extolling the virtues of this suit, prior to now. The suit is made from a thick cotton knit and has an elastic waistband - thus it is essentially a grown-up sweatsuit - perfect for a foggy Monday after a weekend in which you ate your body weight in cake.

Suit: ? via J.C. Penny

Shirt: Gap

Shoes: Me Too

Necklace: $1 bin at consignment store

Delusions

Although she is only 7 days older than me, I often think of my BFF, A, as the older sister I never had. If you get really drunk and stand in a dark room and squint you might even think we are related. Although our physical resemblance is sadly limited to the fact that we are roughly the same size and have dark hair, I often ignore this fact. So when A and I made the realization a few years back that she was an Autumn and not a Winter as we had assumed, I decided that I should be one too.

Now the fact of the matter is that A is classically gorgeous with lovely fair skin that really does look lovely in camels and autumnal hues. Whereas my dark olive skin tends to blend poorly with the same colors. But that doesn't stop me from wanting to look like her and choosing clothing that looks way better on her than on me. Such as this sweater.

Sweater: J. Crew (gift from friends)

Jeans: Citizens for Humanity via Goodwill

Boots: Frye

Scarf: ? gift from my dad's former girlfriend

matilda the plumber

If you ever wondered whether my various wardrobe malfunctions were limited to my work wardrobe, this morning's adventure showed that they are not.

Act One: 7am a sleepy matilda decides that she should go for a jog before work. She puts on her sweatpants and a fleece and heads out the door. The sweatpants feel a little loose, an important fact that matilda ignores.

Act Two: matilda begins her jog/waddle around the neighborhood feeling smugly superior to the people she passes because she is exercising! The sweatpants continue feel loose, which matilda reasons is proof she is burning ALL THE CALORIES.

Act Three: at the end of the jog/waddle, matilda reaches to pull up her pants only to realize that as they slipped down, so had her underwear - exposing the top of her ass to the world at large.

Act Four: matilda plays it safe by wearing a simple dress to work.

Dress: J. Crew

Boots: Clarks

Wonder Woman Mug: gift from BFF

Shirt blues

I was so excited when I tried on this shirt in the store. It seemed so cute and flattering. However, I must have gained some weight on the ride home because as soon as I got it home, it ceased to work for me*. Although I have put it on dozens of times, this is the first time I have left the house in it. A fact which I regret since it gapes in the front - giving everyone (including the judge this morning) a view of my bra and various torso scars.

Suit: Banana Republic

Shirt: Old Navy

Shoes: RJ Girl

Necklace: Urban Outfitters

* Sensible matilda would have returned it but she was overruled by misguidedly optimistic matilda.

Cover Up

To spare you from the bordom of today's outfit (black sweater and jeans), I kept on my fabulous coat for this shot. You are welcome.

Sweater and Jeans: Old Navy

Boots: Gap

Coat: What Goes Around Comes Around

Dark and Blurry

This photo has captured my mood today - dark and blurry. Coming back to work after a few days off is hard, especially when your weekend was full of concerts (They Might Be Giants!), food (if I ever leave my husband, it will be for the fig coca at this place (figs, caramelized onions, and goat cheese on a flat bread - amazing), accomplishment (I managed to run for 4 miles yesterday - a personal best AND I did some laundry so I no longer need to go to Target every few days and buy more underwear), and football (it wasn't pretty but the Jets won yesterday).

Dress: Nine West

Boots: Very Volatile

Blues for Bulges

I'm not sure if this outfit looks good or not, but I like it. The shirt is comfortable and hides all sorts of bulges from overeating (perhaps I should wear it tomorrow as well), the jeans are, well jeans, and the shoes are surprisingly comfortable and make me fabulously tall.

Shirt: ? via TJ Maxx clearance rack

Jeans: Levis via Savers

Shoes: Old Navy clearance

Close up of the awesome details of the shirt

Observatations

I own a lot of many pink sweaters, even though I don't like pink and don't really look good in it. There has been a small piece of cracker under my desk for over a week, supporting my theory that our cleaning people do not vacuum my office (not that I blame them since the floor in my office is usually a landmine of files and papers). I should probably get off my ass and throw away the cracker. There is a serious shortage of decent pens in my office. I would give the one decent pen I have if I could get the entire Thanksgiving weekend off from work. Injuries are decimating my fantasy football teams. Kermit is my favorite Muppet. It took me three times as long to get dressed this morning, only to come up with this dull outfit.

Sweater: Lands End Canvas

Jacket and Necklace: J. Crew (jacket via Goodwill)

Jeans: ? $6 on Amazon

Boots: Taryn Rose

Navy and Silver

I am not actually 100% sure this suit is navy. It may be black. But either way I like it.

Suit: United Colors of Benetton via Goodwill

T-shirt: Old Navy

Shoes: Jessica Simpson

Watch: Citizen

Necklace: ?

Cozy

Today I am preparing for a hearing which means I will be spending a lot of time sitting on the floor in my office (my brain works better when I can spread stuff out and my desk is a lost cause). Thus, I chose comfortable cords and a warm knit sweater. Regrettably, I also chose to put on some fancy lace underwear which is pretty but very uncomfortable.

Would it be wrong to send my intern to Target to pick me up some plain cotton underwear? Probably, although I'm sure I've asked him for worse.

Sweater: Old Navy

Cords: ? via super sale on Amazon

Boots: Frye

Necklace: $1 bin at the consignment store

The Jury Is Out

There is quite a bit of circumstantial evidence that this dress may, in fact, be a nightgown. Exhibit A: It was purchased at Soma Intimates a store that, as the name implies, primarily sells intimates. Exhibit B: It was hanging on a rack next to snowflake pajama pants. Exhibit C: The fabric is exactly the same as in the pair of Winnie the Pooh pajamas I had in 1977 (sans, of course, pictures of Kanga and Pooh).

In spite of the mounting evidence that this dress was not intended for the office, I am wearing it because it was the first thing I saw this morning and it is absurdly comfortable. Although I find baby-doll/empire waist dresses unflattering on me, the use of industrial strength control top tights helps keep everything in check. I should have put on an accessory or two, but I was running late.

Dress: Soma Intimates

Boots: Urban Outfitters

Red, White, and Lazy

95% of the time I do not plan what I'm wearing ahead of time. I just stand in my closet and choose an item and try to build on it. Sometimes it works, sometimes it fails. Today I started with this sweater since I through the bright red would be a good antidote to the gloomy weather. Next I grabbed this t-shirt because it was clean and I thought it might balance the preppiness of the sweater. Since I have never successfully paired red with black (the color of most of my pants), I had the easy choice of grabbing jeans and boots. I ended up adding a belt in a failed effort to disguise my paunch.

How do you get dressed? Do you plan ahead or just grab what suits your mood?

Sweater: Lands End Canvas

T-shirt: Old Navy

Jeans: Levis via Savers

Belt: Linea Pelle

Boots: Target

Hot Pants

A dangerous side effect of reading lots of fashion magazines and blogs is that you sometimes dress like the girls in the magazines instead of a 40 something lawyer who has to go out in public.

Sweater: H&M

Pants: Old Navy

Shoes: BCBG

Shame: MIA

Weekend Recap

I had a really excellent weekend, notwithstanding the fact that I had to work for a portion of it. On Friday night I went to a gathering at my BFF A's house for evening of wine, dessert, and good conversations. On Saturday, mr. deathstar and I went to NYC to see the de Kooning exhibit at the MOMA and then we went shopping at MUJI and bought all sorts of fun things. Yesterday I worked for most of the day but still had time to watch some football. All this on about four hours of sleep.

Sweater: Old Navy
Skirt: ???? from before I got fat and magically back in style
Shoes: Missoni for Target



In other news, check out my fantastic coat. It retailed for $950! but I got it on sale for $125, so of course I HAD to buy it. It is from What Goes Around Comes Around, a very cool line even though I can never afford anything unless it is on super sale.

These Boots Go To 11

Have you ever been to a thrift store and gone back to an aisle you had previously checked only to find a new item had magically appeared? That was this case with this blazer. I was just about to leave the store empty handed when this Blazer magically appeared. For $4 how could I refuse it?

Blazer: Banana Republic via Savers
Jeans: Citizens for Humanity via Goodwill
Top: H&M
Boots: Dr. Martens


Close up of awesome boots

Generosity

In September I had some minor surgery to investigate some "areas of concern" that showed up after some tests. A bunch of my loving and wonderful friends send me a care package which included, among all manner of awesome things, a GC to J. Crew which I used to purchase this sweater.

Also check out this gorgeous Kate Spade iPhone case which another wonderful friend sent me because she was not using it. Score.

Blame Bill Karins

Although the sky is clear, I donned a raincoat because the weather guy assured me it would rain today. Rather than take responsibility for my laziness and poor photo processing skills, I blame Bill Karins for the poor quality of this photo and the fact that you cannot see my cute sweater.

Sweater and Cords: J. Crew (cords via Goodwill)
Shoes: Dr. Martens
Coat: BCBG

Pinstripes

I purchased this blazer over the summer at Goodwill. Although I have been trying to reduce the amount of grey in my wardrobe - for $7 I was not going to pass this up.

Blazer: J. Crew via Goodwill
T-shirt: Old Navy
Jeans: Levis via Savers
Shoes: Target

Simple

If I didn't have this blog, I would probably wear this outfit every day (with the addition of tights on the days I don't feel like shaving). It is easy to wear and the pattern helps the 5lbs I've gained in the last two weeks.

Sweater: Ancient J. Crew
Skirt: Macy's
Shoes: Missoni for Target

Suit

Say hello to good black pantsuit. Unlike most of my suits, she did not come from Goodwill but she does not hold that over the other suits in my closet. In addition to these pieces I have a dress and cropped pants that match the blazer. Versatile!

Suit: Banana Republic
Shirt: J. Crew Factory
Shoes: Me Too
Watch: Citizen
Necklace: eBay

Disconnect

My full length mirror told me I looked great this morning so it was a little surprising (and depressing) when I saw how large and disheveled I look in this photo. Clearly I need to figure out a way of fixing my camera lens to show what the mirror shows. I wonder if Siri can help with that.

Suit: Ann Taylor via Goodwill
Shirt: Old Navy
Shoes: BCBG
Earrings: Kenneth Cole

Skirt

Although you can't tell in the photo, this skirt is navy. It is also a charming conversationalist, votes Democrat, and is either trying to kill me by crushing my ribs or trying to save my life by reminding me not to eat so much. Not bad for a $7 find at Goodwill.

Skirt: Jones NY via Goodwill
Shirt: J. Crew Factory
Shoes: Nine West
Watch: Citizen

Less Stuff = More?

This past weekend I joined the rest of the world and got an iPhone. What finally sold me was the concept of having one device that would replace my iPod and camera and thereby simplifying my life. Of course taking a self timed photo on the iPhone requires a bit more effort and equipment so I am not sure if I have added simplicity or more stuff to my life. Until I figure it all out I will probably continue to carry way too much stuff with me and yet never have what I need when I need it.

Sweater and Shirt: Old Navy
Pants: Banana Republic
Shoes: Me Too
Watch: Citizen

Alexis in the Winter

Although you cannot tell in this photo, I did take the shoulder pads out of this dress in an attempt to tone down the Dynasty vibe a little. Then I added a velvet coat and ended up back where I started. Oh well.

Dress: ? via Goodwill
Coat: ? circa 1999 Bloomingdales
Boots: Clarks
Belt: ?

Sweater, a Love Story

I got this sweater on Friday and have worn it every day since. Although I tend to avoid turtlenecks because they irritate the huge goiter* in my neck, this one is loose enough that I am not bothered. I've wanted a natural colored chunky knit sweater for a long time but most of the ones in my price range have been itchy. Happily I found this one at H&M on Friday and the rest has been history. Also check out my $2.39 skirt courtesy of the clearance rack at Old Navy.

Leather Jacket: J. Crew via Goodwill ($22!)
Sweater: H&M
Skirt: Old Navy
Boots: ???



* I HATE this word and normally refer to this issue a lump or Adam's apple but am using the technical term for the sake of clarity.

Forgiving

I got this shirt for $6 at H&M a few months ago. It is very loose and forgiving and keeps me from looking too ridiculous when I want to wear these fabulous but too tight jeans.

Jacket: ? via Burlington Coat Factory
Shirt: H&M
Tank: Old Navy
Jeans: Citizens for Humanity via Goodwill
Boots: Ugg

Mad Woman

I really like the '60's mad men style of this sweater but I find it hard to wear without starting a baby bump rumor. I also find the color challenging. I ended up playing it safe by pairing it with a slim black skirt (check out the cute zipper detail in the back*). Not the most creative pairing but good enough for a slow, rainy, Wednesday. I chose ankle booties to give the outfit some "edge" and because I need to run around this afternoon and didn't feel like dealing with heels.

Sweater: Zara
Skirt: Banana Republic via eBay
Boots: DV for Target
Watch: Citizen

*Detail of the back of the skirt.

Coed

I had planned to wear a dress today but at the last minute I decided comfort was more important so I channeled my inner '70s coed and threw this on. I tend to shy away from cowboy style boots because it is hard not to feel like a poseur when you live in the north east. However, these boots were a super bargain on eBay and I think the cowboy style is subtle enough for the NYC area.

Jeans: Urban Outfitters
Sweater: J. Crew
Blazer: F21
Scarf: Hayden Harnett
Boots: Vintage Frye via eBay